Damage Control.
That is going to be the name of the game this week. I'm on vacation. Visiting the new (inherited)family in Oshkosh. Gonna be fun. Try not to eat too much. Should be easy enough. It's Oshkosh. Not exactly a vegan paradise.
I'll probably get to ride Monty's Computrainer again. I rode it over last Christmas. Efforts and times recorded. Now we'll get to see what exactly has changed over a year. That is pretty exciting.
Have a happy holiday everyone. I'm not exactly the Christmas type, but I've got a pretty awesome new family to spend time with. I actually see them more than I see my birth parents. I almost feel adopted. I do get to see both of my parents within a few weeks. I'm excited for that. I haven't seen them in far too long.
But I hope that you all have a very special group of people that you get to spend Christmas with. Be it family or friends, I just hope that everyone feels as content as I do. I really did marry into an awesome family.
Have fun with your friends and family. It's Christmas...and it's going to be white.j
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Saturday, December 15, 2007
good news, great new, and interesting developments.
Good news. I've finally started to feel really good on my bike again. About a week ago I started feeling better again. I've pretty much felt like ass since the after Jingle Cross day 1. Even for day 2 I felt a bit gone. I pretty much had spend since then just riding around in my easiest two gears and feeling drained. Not so much anymore. I can actually put power down again. I think that maybe my body has finally recovered from the racing, and I think that commuting 20 miles less every day is being good to my body. I thank it. I love this new commute. 20 minutes is WAY better than 40. There is this "hill" on the way home from my work. About 4 blocks away. Hardly enough time to be warmed up. Not even really a hill, really, but definitely an incline. One that gets noticed. You're never going to make the mistake that you're on a flat. Anyways, There is one of those car speed limit signs that tell you your speed on said stretch of road. I noticed right away that I never was clocked at less than 20mph. (on cross bike turned commuter w/50 psi). Well, one day I got clocked at 18, and didn't feel good. The next I got passed by a car, so it read the cars speed and not mine. Thankfully. Today I was at 24. Not out of the saddle. Not strained. Just pedaling. I thought I'd give it a bit and just put more pressure down, no gear changes, just pedaling faster. I didn't get hit again, as there were more cars on the road, and they get clocked when they're around, so I never got to see where that got me, but I don't really care. What matters is that I can ride a bike again. I can't wait to see what happens when I get back on skinny tires with 125 psi. Oh man, I can't wait.
Interesting Developments:
As a few of you know, I've been looking into starting my own frame company. Importing frames from Taiwan w/ my name and graphics on them. Will have LLC forms submitted by February 1st. Then all I need is a business loan and a place to put things. More importantly than all of that is a name. I don't have one. I'm at a loss for them. If anyone has any ideas, let them rip. It'd be great. Also, if you know a thing or two about bikes, get at me so we can discuss. I've got a few ideas, I'd like more. I think this is actually about to go somewhere. Get excited.
Great news:
I love my wife. A lot. Life is good.
Interesting Developments:
As a few of you know, I've been looking into starting my own frame company. Importing frames from Taiwan w/ my name and graphics on them. Will have LLC forms submitted by February 1st. Then all I need is a business loan and a place to put things. More importantly than all of that is a name. I don't have one. I'm at a loss for them. If anyone has any ideas, let them rip. It'd be great. Also, if you know a thing or two about bikes, get at me so we can discuss. I've got a few ideas, I'd like more. I think this is actually about to go somewhere. Get excited.
Great news:
I love my wife. A lot. Life is good.
Sunday, December 9, 2007
Iron Maiden cheers me up.
Hallowed be thy Name.
"I take a look through the bars at the last sights
Of a world that has gone very wrong for me"
Bruce may mean prison bars, but it's all relative. I think people drink more in colder climates. I don't really blame them. Gotta hang out somewhere. Bars are warm. All I wanted to say in my last post was that I don't think that a decision is necessarily the right decision forever. For me, Straightedge is, and probably will continue to be, the right choice. I don't like the taste of alcohol. It will never be just a beverage to me. If I am going to drink, there will be a reason for it. I just wanted to say that the thought of that is terrifying to me. What in life can be bad enough to be driven to drink? But life hasn't ever, nor will it, beat me. I'm better than life. Stronger and faster than life. I'm not invisible. Life can hurt me. It won't break me.
I just got down. I'm better. I needed to rant. I did. Winter sucks. Days get short, homes get small. Distances get longer. It's just miserable. It's silly. Why would anyone habitate here? Schools, apparently.
"I take a look through the bars at the last sights
Of a world that has gone very wrong for me"
Bruce may mean prison bars, but it's all relative. I think people drink more in colder climates. I don't really blame them. Gotta hang out somewhere. Bars are warm. All I wanted to say in my last post was that I don't think that a decision is necessarily the right decision forever. For me, Straightedge is, and probably will continue to be, the right choice. I don't like the taste of alcohol. It will never be just a beverage to me. If I am going to drink, there will be a reason for it. I just wanted to say that the thought of that is terrifying to me. What in life can be bad enough to be driven to drink? But life hasn't ever, nor will it, beat me. I'm better than life. Stronger and faster than life. I'm not invisible. Life can hurt me. It won't break me.
I just got down. I'm better. I needed to rant. I did. Winter sucks. Days get short, homes get small. Distances get longer. It's just miserable. It's silly. Why would anyone habitate here? Schools, apparently.
Saturday, December 8, 2007
sometimes life is hard.
About once every two years I really start to think a lot about Straightedge and the decision that I've made. Is this a healthy choice? To obsess about nothing, rather than something. At what point is it too much? Is all of life so void of gray area?
Backstory, of sorts. I've been claiming Straightedge since a little before I turned 18. That makes is about 5 and a half years at this point. I guess I'm still a baby compared to some of the kids I know. I drank a bit. Never got drunk, just got a headache. Decided pretty quickly that drinking was not for me. Was quite a little stoner in High School. Even smoked (cigarettes) for a short while. Those things suck really bad. Some good times were had. Some bad times were had. Such is life, I guess. I am very glad to have that experience as I feel that it validates my 'edge' more thoroughly than if I'd never done anything, for some reason. Decided that it was all far from necessary. Didn't look back. Ok, I guess that is a lie. I just said that I look back every two years or so.
The reason I have doubts occasionally is slightly a mystery to me. Not entirely. I think that life gets to me. It happens to everyone, life. You can't really escape it. I often wonder if that was this (straightedge) is supposed to be, an escape. It is kind of like a small island, maybe. It does work. Straightedge works. It got me through a lot of years that are very important. But how long can a small island sustain life? There are no self sufficient small islands, All islands rely on a fairly complex network of trades (imports/exports) to other islands. Societies that try to do it alone fail. I think that maybe straightedge is destined for the same fate. There is no denying that we can't isolate ourselves completely. For the better, for sure. If only that seeing people totally wasted should at least strengthen resolve. But you can't interact with a different culture without adopting some of their norms. It's impossible. Look at any culture from any period of history. You'll find tools or language or architectural similarities far too close to be considered coincidence. What happens when Straightedge interacts with the outside world? One of two things. Either they don't take kindly and wage war (and subsequently die due to a lack of resources), or they co-habitate and adopt cultural norms. That means as least a tolerance for, or even personally, drinking. Best case scenario, you don't drink, you stay strong and hold true. But as you interact with that other culture, you meet people. You end up really liking these people, but these people aren't the same culture. They don't view things the same way you do. Someone has to give (knowingly or not) or they will both break. I think that here is where people get in trouble. It seems that you either live in a bubble, or are faced with self induced difficulty. That's enough of that tangent.
But straightedge works. Somehow. At least until through the most easily influences years of a persons life. Late teens/early twenties are a VERY important time in a persons life. A lot of lifestyle (usually bad) lifestyle choices are made in those years. I could have ended up like so many bar hopping alcoholic twenty somethings with no ambition and making bad art. Instead I ride bikes. That's about it. I ride/race bikes and I love my wife. Not in that order. That's pretty much my life. I focus on pretty much those two things. Not complaining.
I just don't want life to get the best of me. It's hard. I'll be the first to admit that it's hard. Straightedge isn't for everyone. A lot of people lose sight of why they claimed in the first place. Sometimes I do. I can honestly say that if I didn't have straightedge tattoo's I'd have sold out by now. Why? Are my convictions not strong? Perhaps. But maybe, just maybe, that little bit (or lot) of fancy skin art is only strengthening them and my resolve. It certainly makes it a lot harder to give up on something when it stares you in the face all day.
I'm starting to lose track of my thoughts. This is on my mind for a reason. It's hard to be in the minority. Sure, maybe a lot of people don't drink, but how many people are actually against it? I don't think that too many are. Which I think is quite ironic, considering how many lives are touched by alcohol and alcoholism. I'm sure I'd run out of fingers and toes before I ran out of names. I invite you to try the same. You'd think that people would see these things. Maybe think a little more? Not sure. But it isn't exactly a puzzle. What's the deal? Do people really think that they are invincible? That an accident while drinking and driving somehow impossible for them? That failing livers aren't a big deal? Maybe even that a cloudy head won't somehow affect a decision for the worse? Sometimes I wonder if people think at all. I'm starting to think not. I think that if you think you get labeled as "uptight". HA! Whatever. Life is funny.
Fuck. I did it again. Oh well. I think that I hit on everything I wanted to. If you were actually able to read and understand what was just said, please leave a comment with your thoughts. I'm not trying to scrounge up comments, I just would really like to know if maybe I actually am crazy.
Thanks.
Backstory, of sorts. I've been claiming Straightedge since a little before I turned 18. That makes is about 5 and a half years at this point. I guess I'm still a baby compared to some of the kids I know. I drank a bit. Never got drunk, just got a headache. Decided pretty quickly that drinking was not for me. Was quite a little stoner in High School. Even smoked (cigarettes) for a short while. Those things suck really bad. Some good times were had. Some bad times were had. Such is life, I guess. I am very glad to have that experience as I feel that it validates my 'edge' more thoroughly than if I'd never done anything, for some reason. Decided that it was all far from necessary. Didn't look back. Ok, I guess that is a lie. I just said that I look back every two years or so.
The reason I have doubts occasionally is slightly a mystery to me. Not entirely. I think that life gets to me. It happens to everyone, life. You can't really escape it. I often wonder if that was this (straightedge) is supposed to be, an escape. It is kind of like a small island, maybe. It does work. Straightedge works. It got me through a lot of years that are very important. But how long can a small island sustain life? There are no self sufficient small islands, All islands rely on a fairly complex network of trades (imports/exports) to other islands. Societies that try to do it alone fail. I think that maybe straightedge is destined for the same fate. There is no denying that we can't isolate ourselves completely. For the better, for sure. If only that seeing people totally wasted should at least strengthen resolve. But you can't interact with a different culture without adopting some of their norms. It's impossible. Look at any culture from any period of history. You'll find tools or language or architectural similarities far too close to be considered coincidence. What happens when Straightedge interacts with the outside world? One of two things. Either they don't take kindly and wage war (and subsequently die due to a lack of resources), or they co-habitate and adopt cultural norms. That means as least a tolerance for, or even personally, drinking. Best case scenario, you don't drink, you stay strong and hold true. But as you interact with that other culture, you meet people. You end up really liking these people, but these people aren't the same culture. They don't view things the same way you do. Someone has to give (knowingly or not) or they will both break. I think that here is where people get in trouble. It seems that you either live in a bubble, or are faced with self induced difficulty. That's enough of that tangent.
But straightedge works. Somehow. At least until through the most easily influences years of a persons life. Late teens/early twenties are a VERY important time in a persons life. A lot of lifestyle (usually bad) lifestyle choices are made in those years. I could have ended up like so many bar hopping alcoholic twenty somethings with no ambition and making bad art. Instead I ride bikes. That's about it. I ride/race bikes and I love my wife. Not in that order. That's pretty much my life. I focus on pretty much those two things. Not complaining.
I just don't want life to get the best of me. It's hard. I'll be the first to admit that it's hard. Straightedge isn't for everyone. A lot of people lose sight of why they claimed in the first place. Sometimes I do. I can honestly say that if I didn't have straightedge tattoo's I'd have sold out by now. Why? Are my convictions not strong? Perhaps. But maybe, just maybe, that little bit (or lot) of fancy skin art is only strengthening them and my resolve. It certainly makes it a lot harder to give up on something when it stares you in the face all day.
I'm starting to lose track of my thoughts. This is on my mind for a reason. It's hard to be in the minority. Sure, maybe a lot of people don't drink, but how many people are actually against it? I don't think that too many are. Which I think is quite ironic, considering how many lives are touched by alcohol and alcoholism. I'm sure I'd run out of fingers and toes before I ran out of names. I invite you to try the same. You'd think that people would see these things. Maybe think a little more? Not sure. But it isn't exactly a puzzle. What's the deal? Do people really think that they are invincible? That an accident while drinking and driving somehow impossible for them? That failing livers aren't a big deal? Maybe even that a cloudy head won't somehow affect a decision for the worse? Sometimes I wonder if people think at all. I'm starting to think not. I think that if you think you get labeled as "uptight". HA! Whatever. Life is funny.
Fuck. I did it again. Oh well. I think that I hit on everything I wanted to. If you were actually able to read and understand what was just said, please leave a comment with your thoughts. I'm not trying to scrounge up comments, I just would really like to know if maybe I actually am crazy.
Thanks.
Friday, December 7, 2007
theory.
So, I've found over the years that riding a bike in the winter is substantially more difficult than when it is of moderate temperature outside. Is it a purely psychological ordeal? Is there something more to it than that? I'm not a scientist, trust me, but I would venture to claim that colder air is actually more difficult to ride through on a molecular level. Don't molecules get closer together as they get colder? Wouldn't molecules being closer together be more dense? Aren't things that are more dense harder to work your way through? Isn't that why running in water is so damn much harder? I don't know. You tell me. Go get scientific and tell me I'm right. I dare you.
Thursday, December 6, 2007
stupid USAC
I got denied. I tried to send in my results on the year and get them to let me start at Cat 4 rather than 5 on the road. It didn't work. Granted, I didn't fulfill the requirements, but a 10th place at the State Champs in a 4/5 field and then a pretty successful cross season (which got me the upgrade to Cat 3) should have told them I don't quite belong in Cat 5. Oh well. While that is unfortunate and it does dissappoint me, I'm ok with it. My goals are staying the same. Only now I am going to show those fuckers and win (minimum a first and a second) in my first two races. I'll only accept a second if Jake decides he wants to either work with me or challenge me. I'll split a 1/2 with him. Nothing less. What'dya say Jake? Can we do it. Or better yet, do you want to do it?
I just have to wonder whether or not the regional USAC rep in charge of upgrades used to be my manager at QBP. I wonder if I've been blacklisted.
Fuck 'em. Let them try to stop me.
I just have to wonder whether or not the regional USAC rep in charge of upgrades used to be my manager at QBP. I wonder if I've been blacklisted.
Fuck 'em. Let them try to stop me.
Saturday, December 1, 2007
Coldsprints and white power.
Well. Coldsprints was fun. I didn't qualify, But at one point I was tied for the lead. Jake won. That's awesome. He looked really tough doing it. I might actually end up being the slowest guy on the team next year. That is a scary thought. Time to cut out the shit food (trust me) and do some work. I was hoping to take a bit longer break. Oh well. Can't hurt. Yeah. Come out next month. Ginger ale and massive plates of french fries (carbo-loading! and I'm sure that there is some sort of electrolyte in the salt). Good times for sure! I'll actually qualify next time.
And...white power. Not racism type, but the power and majesty that is the first real snowfall. It's pretty awesome. It's fun for now. Give it a few months. It'll get old. Fast. I love waking up to a coat of white-ness on the ground. (And if you doubt the power of snow, talk to Spencer. Ask him about his trip to MKE for the WI state champs.)
It was fun. The dogs don't like snow. At least the little one doesn't. HILARIOUS! My wife stole my idea to make him some booties. Straight up swiped! Oh well, it turned out well enough (better than if I had done it) and not only that, but the dog actually didn't mind them! They kept his little feet warm long enough for him to actually pee on something. He doesn't deal well with cold. He is good for being cute, though. Animal Planet straight to your face!
And...white power. Not racism type, but the power and majesty that is the first real snowfall. It's pretty awesome. It's fun for now. Give it a few months. It'll get old. Fast. I love waking up to a coat of white-ness on the ground. (And if you doubt the power of snow, talk to Spencer. Ask him about his trip to MKE for the WI state champs.)
It was fun. The dogs don't like snow. At least the little one doesn't. HILARIOUS! My wife stole my idea to make him some booties. Straight up swiped! Oh well, it turned out well enough (better than if I had done it) and not only that, but the dog actually didn't mind them! They kept his little feet warm long enough for him to actually pee on something. He doesn't deal well with cold. He is good for being cute, though. Animal Planet straight to your face!
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